Title: Was It Something I Didn't
Say
Part: 1/1
Author: Wendy
Category: 98º
Rating: PG
Copyright: 1999
¤¤¤ Justin’s POV ¤¤¤
Ashley went out the door to our house exactly six months ago and I hadn’t seen her since that day. Every night, I tossed and turned and thought back vividly on that moment.
"Justin, I can’t be with you anymore," Ashley ocean blue eyes looked away from mine.
"What do you mean, Ash?" I looked her with a shocked expression on my face.
She walked toward our closet and picked up a couple of luggage in her hands. "There’s no easy way for me to tell you this, but I just don’t think that I can be with you anymore."
She took the bags and ran downstairs. I ran after her, but I knew that it was no use. Once Ashley set her mind to something, I knew that there was no stopping her.
That was the day I let the most important person in my life walk out of my life. I regretted it tremendously, and I tried everything I could to get Ashley back into my life, but it was no use.
¤¤¤ Ashley’s POV ¤¤¤
"Ash, if you still love him, why don’t you go back?" my roommate and best friend, Wendy, told me.
I had been mopping around the house the entire day, not doing anything productive at all.
"Wendy, we’ve been through this more than a million times. He doesn’t love me," I stated it to her.
"I know that you told me that he never told you that, but maybe he’s afraid to tell you or something. I hate seeing you like this," Wendy said. She had been trying to get me back with Justin ever since we broke up.
"Listen, Wendy, I love you for trying, but I just can’t stand knowing the man that I love doesn’t love me back. Or doesn’t love me and trust me enough to tell me that he loves me. Whichever explains it to you is good for me."
Wendy sighed. She knew that it’s another day that was lost in her effort to get Justin and me back together.
~~~ Six months later ~~~
¤¤¤ Justin’s POV ¤¤¤
It had been a year ever since I last saw Ashley. I hadn’t seen another woman since her because her perpetual image still stood vividly in my mind. Her ocean blue eyes, her soft blond hair and her tall and slender body were still plant in my head. I didn’t know how I could just let her slip out of my grasp.
We were going back home to do an autograph session at one of the local music stores. As we arrived at the mall, where the music store was located, we saw thousands of fans waiting for us and we knew that it was going to be a long afternoon. I loved my job, but I just wished that there was a little break for us.
Drew, Nick, Jeff and I entered the mall with our bodyguards on our side. We could see fans taking pictures of us as we quickly entered the store behind some police railings. The store opened and we saw many fans rushed to come see us.
¤¤¤ Ashley’s POV ¤¤¤
My boyfriend and I decided to hang out for a little bit at the mall and grab some lunch to eat. We saw a huge crowd around the music store and we were just wondering what was going on. Then we saw a sign that welcomed 98 Degrees. I hadn’t follow 98 Degrees ever since Justin and I broke up and I couldn’t think of anything at that moment except for Justin.
"Ash? Hello?" my boyfriend, Matt, waved his hand wildly in front of my face.
I snapped out of my daze. The two of us started to get pass the music store and we headed to the food court. We grabbed a little bit for lunch.
"I’ll be right back, Matt," I told him and headed in the direction of the washrooms, but instead, I was drawn to the music store.
I saw crowds of people and then I felt someone tap me lightly on my shoulder.
¤¤¤ Justin’s POV ¤¤¤
I finally believed that it was Ashley who I had been seeing when I saw her looking into the music store. She turned around. She looks almost the same since the last time I saw her. The same piercing ocean blue eyes, although her hair had gotten a little longer.
"Justin!" Ashley turned around and I could tell she was surprised to see me.
"Ashley…" I was speechless by her beauty, "how are you?"
"I’m doing okay. It looks like you guys have really hit it big," she said, looking over at Drew, Nick and Jeff, who were signing autographs.
"Yeah, it’s been great. Listen, Ash—"
She interrupted me. "J, don’t say it. I was in a lot of pain when we broke up, but I’ve moved on."
Her words just didn’t seem real to me. I thought that if I saw her, everything was going to be okay.
"I’m sorry, Justin," Ashley said conclusively.
I looked away, not wanting her to see the pain in my eyes. "Maybe it’ll work out in another place and time, but Ashley, before I let you walk out of my life again, I just want you to know that I love you."
¤¤¤ Ashley’s POV ¤¤¤
In the year that Justin and I dated, he never once told me that he loved me, and now that he did, I don’t want to hear it. It’s weird how things like that happen.
"Yeah, maybe…" I muttered under my breath.
"Well, listen, I have to head back to the guys," Justin said.
"Yeah."
Justin turned away and I couldn’t believe that I let him walk away from what we had. Matt and I had a lot in common, of course, but it was nothing like what Justin and I shared. Deep down inside, I had thought for a long time that Justin and I were soulmates. Maybe it would happen in another place and time, like he said, but seeing him again was just too much for me to handle at the moment.
Slowly, I headed back to the food court and back to Matt.
¤¤¤ Justin’s POV ¤¤¤
I headed back to Drew, Nick and Jeff, but my mind wasn’t with them at all. Instead, I thought about Ashley and how stupid I was for not telling her that I loved her before. It would’ve saved us both a lot of pain. I guess that I would just have to live with that in my life forever.
I went back to signing autographs, and suddenly, as if that was how it was meant to be, "Was It Something I Didn’t Say" started to play.
Spending another night alone
Wondering when I'm gonna ever see you again
Thinking what I would give to get you back baby
I should have told you how I felt then
Instead I kept it to myself, yeah
I let my love go unexpressed
'Till it was too late
You walked away
Was it some thing I didn't
say
When I didn't say "I love you"
Was it words that you never heard
All those words I should have
told you
All those times, all those nights when I had the chance to
Was it something I didn’t say
(I didn’t say, Baby..I didn’t say)
Always assumed that you'd be
there
Couldn’t foresee the day you'd ever be leaving me
How could I let my world slip through my hands baby
I took for granted that you knew, yeah
All of the love I had for you, yeah
I guess you never had a clue
'Till it was too late
You walked away
Was it some thing I didn't
say
When I didn't say "I love you"
Was it words that you never heard
All the words were in my
heart
They went unspoken
Baby now my silent heart is a heart that's broken
I should’ve said so many things
Should’ve let you know you're the one I needed near me
But I never let you hear me
Was it some thing I didn't
say
When I didn't say "I love you"
Was it words that you never heard